Sunday, January 8, 2012

Futurecast.

http://www.pinkbike.com/news/Pinkbikes-Predictions-for-2012.html
Oh,Pinkbike.Why do you do this to yourself?
It's time once again for "What I think about the shit in this article."...

The Comeback-Will Hill comeback and dominate?Nope.Why?He doesn't have the whole package.He's fast.Fucking fast,but the consistancy,smoothness,and ability to put it all together in 3 minutes isn't anywhere near the level of Gwin.Plus Hill doesn't have Johnny T and Ryan Hughes behind him.Two full fledged 'Murican badasses right there.

More Flow-Really,you're bummed you have to sit down for a split second right before you hit the good stuff?Is it really that much of a hassle?Dropper posts need to get more reliable before we start cramming more shit into them.It'd probably be easier to drop your post down if you got rid of your sticky ass Reverb too,Levy.Do yourself a favor and snatch up a Gravity Dropper...but then again,Sram's dick is probably too deep down your throat to pull that off.

Hard to Beat-Yup,derailers are hard to beat.Espically with Shimano fully on fucking point with their + line of derailers.Although those crafty little buggers from the land of Kiwi have made a mighty push in the world of DH with their beautiful G1 gearbox bike.Zerode also has the much lusted after full carbon gearbox trail bike in the works.Prove me wrong Zerode,prove me wrong.

Less is More-Stop shoving trail bikes down my neck,everyone.Yeah,I ride one.Mile for mile,more than any of my other bikes,too.But I don't need to hear about how they're "worth more for the money","the most fun you can have" and all that other shit.I'm sorry but the fun factor of my DH bike will never be replaced by anything.

Will 650's re-emerge in 2012?-God I fucking hope not.The last thing mountain bikes need is another group of people telling me why my "outdated" wheel size sucks as they finally catch up to me after I blew their doors off on something with a slight downhill gradient and a couple of corners.That and we don't need Kenda to make another size of the Nevegal.

Will 4x return to World Cups?-I wasn't bummed to see it go.A bunch of washed up Euro BMXer's on weird ass bikes constantly getting beat by Graves isn't something i'm gonna miss.Replace it with slalom and the world will once again be correct.Actually replace it with anything that isn't Eliminator XC or any other event that keeps Brian "BL55" Lopes a star.

Will Enduro Racing Gain Traction in 'Merica?-Nope.We don't have the terrain or the people willing to put the events on.Yeah, sure Merica' could probably produce some race they call an "Enduro" race that would end up being won by some XC dork on a carbon 29'er hardtail because it would be some 100 mile slog through the mountains with 10,000' of climbing and 700' of fire road descent.If enduro racing happens over here or not one thing will be forsure,Weir will continue to be the posterboy of the "too slow for DH,too lazy for XC"crowd.

Will the UCI Enfore Dress Codes in DH?-No.They really don't right now,besides in France.But I get psyched seeing Ben Reid cut up cereal boxes and tape them inside his jersey to fake out "Le Officials".Let the riders wear whatever they want.They're fucking professionals.

Will Slopestyle Plateau?-Not if Cam Zink has anything to do with it.




Derailer killer? Maybe.Dream boat? Absolutely.


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