Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Marketing manager.

Way to make that paper Eddie!






Sooooo psychhhheeed,bro.

Friday, September 21, 2012

Toolgasam.


Wait what?!
Replaceable,gold plated bits and an annodized alumnium body?
According to my man on the scene/manager,who I sent a frantic text to last night after seeing this thing, there's only going to be 10,000 made and they won't be avaliable untill Novmeber.All I know is I will own atleast 3 of them.

Sixhundred and fifty Bee.

http://www.bikerumor.com/2012/09/18/khs-dh-650b-downhill-mountain-bike-headed-for-production/
I touched on Intense's hodge podge M927.5 the other day,and I knew that this bike already exsisted,but here is some more vague and shitty details about the first wave of the infectious disease known as "650b DH bikes."Now,as usual on TEAM DUMPED!,we present you with another episode of "What we think of the shit in the article."...

They first start by saying that it's easier to make a 650b bike function well,over making a 26'' bike function well.Now I don't quite understand this statement for a few reasons.Number one being how?At this current time in DH bikes,geometry's pretty much set in stone.63 to 64 degree headangle,sub 14'' BB height,and 17.something inch chainstays,all paired up to a roughly 23'' top tube and 16 to 17'' seat tube.Plug some bendy tubes and linkage pieces in there,and taa-daa,you have a modern DH bike that will meet most people's needs.So how does throwing that chainstay length,headtube angle,and BB height out the window make the bike easier to produce?Oh,I know how KHS...you don't produce your own bikes.Which brings me to reason nubmer two.Of course your bike was easier to produce.You called Astro,told them you wanted their 2013 catalog,waited for the catalog to ship from Taiwan,saw they did a 650b version of your DH300 and went "We fucking want that!" and placed an order for a few units to test out.

The next point they cover is the fact the they went all "Foward Geometry" on us and made the front to center of the bike 2'' longer.2'' longer!Holy dumb fuck.Now,you pair that with a suuuuuper short stem and it makes a little bit of sense,but KHS mentions nothing about that.So from what I can gather they want us regular folk who,lets say ride a medium sized bike with an effective top tube of 23'',to then jump on a bike with an effective top tube of 25'' and feel normal?I like a roomy top tube,but fuck that.I don't want to feel like i'm riding dad's bike every time I go for a lap.The weirdest thing in this article is the last thing they mention though,the fact that after making the front to center massively longer,they only lengthened the rear to center a half inch.I personally think this is a weird move,I know they didn't want to make the bike any longer than it already is(as shown in picture below),but isn't that going to throw off the rider weight bias a ton?I thought that's what we were trying to fight?Norco produces each size of the Arrum with a different chainstay length to combat this problem of bikes not feeling or acting correct under the rider.KHS said "The hell with that,people want bigger wheels,not a quality riding bicycle!"

And so it begins...the next round of brutal haymakers to my friend the 26'' wheel.Sooner rather than later all,and I mean all,of my bikes will ride like goofy,shitty pieces of alumnium and rubber.


Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Tool time.


What you see there is a peek inside Sram's #1 wrench,Evan Warner,tool set up.
Seeing as I work on bikes as a full time gig and one day aspire to travel around the world,standing in a glorified open air tent while it's below freezing and pissing rain,clipping knobs off of spike tires and bleeding brakes whilst trying to talk myself out of killing myself as I align chainguides and pump tires to exact PSI's,i'm a bit of a nerd for tools.

So come with me as I nerd out on a couple of tools that I can't live without,from the depths of my personal tool box,not including the tool of all tools,the Park 3-way Y wrench...





1.Pedro's tire levers.Any time I encounter a flat tire,this is the first thing I reach for.The shape,the feel,the spoke hook and the way they snap together,lego style,all adds up to making THE perfect fucking tire lever.I go totally Busch League if I don't have one of these while chainging a flat,too.Shit takes me twice as long and makes me 80 times more pissed.I'm currently weighing out in my mind if spending close to $50 for a box of these things is worth it in the long run.




2.Pedro's vice whip.Taking off a cassette is the easiest and most time consuming job that I regularly have to do.Regular ass chain whips add to the time and frustration,so when I first laid eyes and hands on one of these bad larry's I was hooked.Clamp it on a cog somewhere towards the middle of the cassette,rip off the lock ring,and you're done.No fucking around with a slipping chain whip.




3.Bontrager torque key.Pre-set to not let your ham fist go over 5nm of torque.Slam a bar into a stem,carbon or alumnium,mindlessly tighten the bolts and this little beauty lets out a reassuring snap letting you know your bars aren't loose or crushed.My only gripe is the non interchangeable bit,I would gladly shell out some hard earned money for a 5mm one,Bontrager.Another plus to this thing is they're typically free,as long as people buy 6 series Madone's in your shop and you're the one who builds them.

I could go on and on for fucking days about the tools I get psyched on.I'm currently psyched on a $5 Park Tool presta/schrader valve core tool,but i'll spare you.Go out and buy some cool-ass tools and shit.You won't regret it.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Brotocross.

Has the right idea.


Season ender.



It took all season to get tracks that finally look like this?
Fucking way to go UCI.More of this,less of South Africa.

Bring on Saturday...
(that's right I said Saturday,for some reason finals are on Saturday at this World Cup.)

Your friendly friends.


It ain't on dirt,but who gives a shit.
The Bosman,part time author of this website,laying it over.

Monday, September 10, 2012

I don't know how I feel about this.


Yeah.
You're seeing that right.
It's an M9 with some silly new drop-outs to fit that thing in there.Now,as I stated a few days ago,I would give 650b's more than just a shot.But,that statement was made in reguard to trail bikes and trail bikes only.This...this is a whole-nother story...

To be continued.

Support the cause.

Always remember.




Tuesday, September 4, 2012

A guide.


Hmmmm.My shiny new Demo frame falls into the "green" category.
To the internet forums so I can defend my purchase!

European Bicycle.

TEAM DUMPED! presents:Shit from EuroBike 2012.



Oh fuck.This right here is the new 5.10 freerider.Thanks Adidas for buying 5.10,you made the DH shoes go from what appears to look like Army surplus boots for marching through barren deserts to something that a German raver would wear in the mid 90's.Just fucking take a pair of black Half Cabs,cobble your magical little sole onto them and charge me lots of money.Done and done.


Syntace with "negative rise" handle bars,specially designed for 29ers.So I assume wheel size dictates handle bar rise now.26'' wheels mean you run a 1'' rise,650b gets you flat bars,and 29ers are stuck with negative 1/4''.Can't wait to see some fuckstick roll his bike through my shop doors with these bad doggers bolted on.

Astro,the company that more than likely makes the bike you're riding showed up with this thing.A full carbon DH frame featuring strikingly similar looks to a Mondraker,but with the addition of some sort of shock protector,superbike fairing,aero drag-reducing downtube enhancement.What company's sticker will end up in place of Astro's?

I guess this bike is from a company called Genesis.I know nothing more than that it has 120mm of travel and is built around a 140mm travel fork.Oh,and that I fucking want it.

Oh nooooooo! What have you done Morewood?You go from producing the Makulu to this?It looks like something I can pick up at Sports Authority.Let us hope that the ugly stick that hit this thing doesn't brush up aginst the longer travel bikes in their line up.

Fucking quit it Look.You're not going to have the same success you did with the Keo pedal in the road world with this pile of shit in the mountain bike world.Let Crank Brothers do their thing while you fold up shop on the MTB side of things.

Where do I even start?The fact it's an Ellsworth?The fact it has probably the ugliest carbon seatstays of all time?The fact they brought a show bike to Europe's Interbike and didn't even attempt to apply decals to the fork lowers?Or the fact they want $3,000 for this out-dated relic of shittyness.

I feel weird saying this,but this thing looks like a dream.Yeah,it's 650b,but i'm gonna come out of my hate filled shell and say i'd be willing to give 650's more than just a shot.I don't know shit about Rotwild beyond the fact that they sponsor Ritchey Schley and they're German,but holy shit.Big-ish wheels,slack as fuck angles,and all the necessary fixings to make this bike dominate anything labeled as "trail" or "enduro".Fuck me I want one.


Saturday, September 1, 2012